My 15-year-old daughter was a 13-year-old 8th grader when we left traditional church. The transition was hardest on her. Here are her reflections. What feelings did you have when Dad and I first made the transition from traditional church to a home group? I was mad because you decided to change and I didn't want to, but because you are my parents, I felt I had no choice. I didn't see much good that would come from it. Unlike you and Dad who had a problem with the whole set up, I liked our former church and didn't have any problems with it except for one staffing decision and their reaction to a trans-kid. What are your feelings now, 2 years later? I like it. It's good. I still miss some things from normal church such as praise and worship time with so many people and the idea of a Sunday morning and getting all dressed up, but I like how ours is an open conversation and getting closer with people, almost having a second family. It pushes us to take our faith into our own hands. I have to make it happen, rather than just going to what is already scheduled. I like how the parents took the initiative to create this. Saturday nights are also easier than Sunday mornings. How are you taking your faith into your own hands? I read my Bible every night. I started a Bible study with friends. I fill my life with Christian music and others things of faith, even my clothing and jewelry. That's a way for me to share the gospel. I also go to youth group on my own at my former church. Would you look for a similar experience when you're on your own someday? If I did, I'd also go to church on Sundays because I really love the worship part of church. Now I get it on Wednesday nights at youth group, but when I'm older, I won't have youth group. What would you like to say to other teens moving into a small faith gathering experience like ours? Be open minded. Even if you think it isn't enough, realize you can do other things as well. It's a really cool experience you should at least try.
1 Comment
We sat in the parking lot at 11:30 that night, twenty or so parents enjoying one another's company and honoring the community formed through youth sports. In those moments of reflection, joy, and camaraderie, a parent leaned into me and quietly asked, "Are you religious or spiritual?" I didn't answer right away because I knew my response would be cliché. And again, "Are you religious or spiritual?" "Well, spiritual." "No, you're not." I went to bed knowing my friend was right and wondering what the most honest response is for me. The next morning I woke up still contemplating the question. May I claim a third option? Contemplative. Merriam-Webster says contemplation, the action of a contemplative, is (1) "concentration on spiritual things as a form of private devotion" and (2) "a state of mystical awareness of God's being." Fr. Richard Rohr, whose meditations I read daily, posted this about contemplatives on July 2, 2015: "They come to enjoy God, others and even themselves, and do not need to pick fights in their minds about everything." St. Gregory the Great said that the contemplative life is to focus on "the love of God and neighbor" and also to "rest from all exterior action." I am most peace-filled when I contemplate God and the unknown, as well as when I sweep out every thought and leave my mind empty. The unknown leads me to faith. The emptiness makes space for peace. Contemplative admits that there's a lot I don't know, and I'm so okay with that. To my parking lot friend (and really to all of you), let's keep talking and contemplating. I'm a poor representative of the religious and will never reach spiritual. But, I'm contemplating, and I'm at peace with that. |